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The Craziest F#?king Thing I’ve Ever Heard

2 May 2009

As you might recall, my buddy Seth was transformed into an Internet sensation, after 80 trillion baseball sites and blogs linked to his epic Mets rant earlier this week.

In a nutshell: With the game on the line, Mets Manager Jerry Manuel decided he didn’t want Ramon Castro (a pretty good hitter and easily the Mets’ best option at the time given their multiple injuries) to bat. Instead, Manuel decided to go with Omir Santos, a lifelong bush leaguer with a career 651(!) minor league OPS. Santos had a few days earlier hit a grand slam, you see. Also, according to a few plugged-in writers in New York, Manuel hates Castro and wanted to undermine/humiliate him to the point where he’d demand to be traded or released. So whether the reason was ignoring years and years of blatantly obvious statistical evidence, fixating on a personal grudge at the expense of his team, or the BS excuse Manuel actually used (Santos has “a shorter swing” so he’d fare better against Marlins hard-throwing closer Matt Lindstrom), Manuel went to Santos in the big spot.

But that wasn’t even the end of it. To get Santos up to the plate, Manuel had to summon him…FROM THE BULLPEN. WHERE HE WAS IN FULL CATCHER’S GEAR, WARMING UP A PITCHER. The switch took roughly an hour and a half, or about as long as it would take the Mets to summon a fan from the top row of the upper deck, train him for a decade to learn how to hit big league pitching, sign him to a contract, then put him up at the plate. There was a 0% chance that Santos was going to come through in this situation. The Mets did the Marlins a gigantic favor. HUGE.

So what happened today? MLB fined Jerry Manuel for “icing” Lindstrom by making a switch that took so long to execute.

With apologies to Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA:

Punting the game by pinch-hitting with a guy in the bullpen who’s spent his entire adult life proving he can’t hit a baseball? That’s ludicrous. But fining the person who made the move by arguing that he was somehow trying to gain an advantage for his team? That’s The Craziest F#?king Thing I’ve Ever Heard.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. metsfanvi permalink
    2 May 2009 6:55 pm

    No. The Craziest F#?king Thing I’ve Ever Heard would be do it again. In a tie game. In the 8th inning. With a runner in scoring position.

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